woke up naked, spooning with wine bottle.. and my video chat was still open. fuck, not again.
Its a long story, but I have superglue on my tongue
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
He just said "I know you want my cock" and I said nah. I want food bro
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
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