i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
my phone vibrated itself into my puke bucket and literally sizzled. you'll have to reach me at this number for a while.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
He came in asked for the bathroom and came out 10 minutes later dripping wet took his redbull and left.
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Just found out my ex boss was running a whore house in the bar. Time to remove her as a reference?
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
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