just heard the best thing ever: calling people's kids "fuck trophies"
I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
The drunk people on this bus are singing Journey songs. This is the whitest thing I've ever experienced
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
well, you know. whores of a feather.
i have too much dick at my disposal? i should make them fight. best dick pic gets laid
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Randomize
