She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
i made the cop pinkie-promise not to arrest me if i failed the breathalizer.
I had to put my glasses on last night to watch porn. SO getting lasik with my tax returns this year.
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Just finished texting the 27th male name in my phone that i don't recognize. none of them were the hott kid i made out with last night. the search continues.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
$5 long island pitchers = roommate pissing on his laptop at 3am.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
I knocked myself out momentarily last night when I fell and hit my head off of my jewelry box while trying to take his pants off... while he was passed out.
I'm to childless and to single to be asking myself why I'm so sticky
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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