What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
I haven't been this sober since birth.
I told my girl, that I use to jerk off to Star Trek. All she says is, "Oh my gawd, you're such a trekie!". If I was her, I'd be weirded out more than me being a Trek Fan.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
Ok, gonna go sleep cuz my brain wants to be smart and not follow my pussy into the danger zone
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
I do believe at one point I was dispensing medical advice while wearing your sombrero and a hulk hand
Idk I somehow continue to get laid by pulling my dick out and reciting the 3 world country orphan kid commercials
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
His dick looks just like him, taller than average, thick, and somehow always angry.
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
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