And i quote: "where's y'alls from comin' in with them accents?" - from a mississipi mcdonalds
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
She fell asleep with me.... We found her pantsless in the dogbed in the morning... Russian foreign exchange students
He looks like a fat version of lurch from the adams family and smells like fritos. This is not the caliber man I want pleasuring himself to the thought of me!
A blind man just put his face in my cleavage. I'm also crying.
She just texted me apologizing for taking selfies on my phone then asked me to send them to her
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
Well. I hope my dad likes whatever sweater stoned me picks out.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
I'm the girl holding the bag of goldfish
you made the house rule that every time you'd say "yay" everyone had to drink.
that explains so much
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
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