he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
You thought cars couldnt see you if you stuck your head in the mail box
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
I don't think he realizes it but he was stroking the faucet while he was talking to me.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Sounds good! I plan on writing a book entitled: I've Probably Done Cocaine In Your Bathroom. A tell-all by Lauren.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
I'm gonna have sex with my clothes on and I'll know everyone there so I'll be in my comfort zone
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
He saved that picture of my boobs for good luck romance still exists
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
Well. Another one of my exes came out of the closet.
Randomize
