Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
whatcha mean you cant get rid of genital warts? thats not what my girlfriend says
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
time to play the game of how much Christmas shopping I can get done before these shrooms kick in
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
fuck emotions I should've gotten more cats
My v day was great. There's a cum stain in the shape of a handprint on my sheets
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
I am at the car wash dressed as a turn of the century librarian
I promised her before I left that I'd make good choices and then got drunk and fucked my best friend and her boyfriend.
Randomize
