Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
Most of my life can be described like an HBO prison drama.
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
Fun. You missed it. Michael broke a door with his erection.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Randomize
