Just figured out how to smoke weed with a toaster.
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Heard puking from next door. Looks like the third floor won't be any different than the second.
My mom just found my nipple clamps...... oh God why....
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
Drunk me is basically the Oprah of nudes. Everyone gets one.
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long story
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weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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