You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
I'm 99% sure that for 3 hours I thought you were British. We must smoke that again.
she was using bread to soak up the vodka off the floor then proceeded to eat it.
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
So after he broke the crutches and got us kicked out of McDonalds, we stole a bike and when we got back to the hotel, he jumped out the window into the bushes.
Yeah when he is drunk, he seems to think he is Captain Americas Canadian counterpart, Captain Canuck
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
If I die, sorry about rent.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
Randomize
