Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
she just uttered the sweetest sentence in the english language...my stripper friends are coming over
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
we're making bets on your personal life
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
I woke up and saw that my last google search was "Bacon neck".
besides the unzipped fly, the black eye and the toilet paper on your shoe you looked really sexy today baby!
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