belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
I hate the Packers so much, I wouldn't cheer for them if they were playing al Qaeda.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Would it be weird if your parents sold me weed?
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
the awesomest thing about staying behind in our lame ass dorm room by myself during spring break: I've now nutted in 3 inconspicuous locations on your side of the room. brag to me again about how fucking awesome tahoe is you shithead. I dare you.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
