My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
He titled his birthday party on facebook, "BJ's in PJ's- an adult slumber party." I'm the only one invited.
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
I figure that my generation of my family needs an alcoholic. I'll take that burden.
tonights mission is daddy issue patrol - we wear old spice and drink gin martinis and see who reacts.
We got naked and peed in the garden. Something about bonding with our new house
Someone left me hummas on my door step between the hours of 1am-3am
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
I'm gonna go ahead and say I love our drinking habits but anytime we roundhouse a 750 of Schnapps on the way to a non competitive bowling league we might have problems
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
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