I should have been more specific when I asked for 8 inches.
Her vagina smelled like bad decisions
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
It's like eating cereal and milk but instead of cereal it's gummy bears and instead of milk it's vodka.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Maybe your new years resolution should be not to fuck in Sears bathroom anymore.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
i feel like when you brought up the possibility of you getting pregnant the sexting is over
I'm more than my video games and dildo collection
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
