her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Now there are nude photos of that bangin hot Russian spy chick...this is officially the best scandal ever.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
If you were a real friend you would have told me you saw me in a porno despite how awkward of a convo it is. You act like I should always know when I'm being recorded.
I could have made money off of that but no you had to wait 2 years to drunkenly tell me this shit.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
That's not your dick yours is smaller. Nice try.
Wait why do you have a pic of someone else's dick in your phone?
Medically speaking as your gynecologist and your girlfriend, that is not a rash.
And we're breaking up
I mean of all the things to be cockblocked by, Taco Bell is pretty high on the list
That was the second worst thing to happen to my asshole.
My sensibilities as a lady demand we cuddle on the couch, and THEN have loud, raunchy sex. Idk, what do you want to do?
I was about to break it off with him because I realised he only wanted me for sex, until I realised that I only wanted HIM for sex. Win/win
Someone made a mask out of a crown royal bag. Can't decide if tacky or awesome.
Randomize
