My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
i wanted to be an indian when i was a child. apparently you cannot grow up to be an indian.
she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear
ya, but you'll graduate college with a higher education. I'm looking at at least two addictions, an abortion, and a few weeks jail time.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
There are pictures of you on the shoulders of some old guy dressed as borat
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
Shitty. Well if it makes you feel any better I just had a toothless wasted crackhead in my bar who was mad because there are TOO MANY FUCKIN TREES in Nantucket.
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
Dude I had my dad cock block me once
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