You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Oh they knew you from a bachelorette party! You were the pole?
Ohhh shit yeah that was me. Fuck. I hate myself when I do that.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
Dude, the chicks a procotolgy intern. Don't cheat on her. She knows where it hurts the most.
To keep it classy I will take a pregnacy test on Mother's Day
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
It was like sex on an active volcano surrounded by the night sky and bloodhounds. And by that I mean it was nice.
You thought they were asking for volunteers for a karaoke contest so you jumped up not realizing it was actually a "last 3 minutes boxing match". But you took that right hook like a champ.
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
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