Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
I just randomly started counting the number of guys that I've hooked up with that are now gay. 11.
What would you have done with a 40 foot neon parrot anyway?
Like some sort of pot growing robin hood.
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
You called me and said "Aidan's unconscious" to which he said "I'm conscious, I'm conscious pilot"
He was filled with the holy spirit. And vodka.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
That shot was terrible
You were like one of those guys at carnivals that spit out fire..... Except it was throw up
I was just trying to be a good friend but in retrospect I probably shouldn't have pepper sprayed you.
She came out of the bathroom listening to her iPod and crying. Then she started scream 'she will be loved'. She seems to be handling the break up well lol
Randomize
