She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
Having kids is risky. They might end up weird.
2 bagels in my tummy and my herpes on my mind
Dude totally calling you out on watching when harry met sally on netflix on demand on april 8th.
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
So my bf wanted to cum on my face and I let him. Afterwards I wiped some off, wiped it across his forehead and said, "The king has returned".
I feel like saying your blowjobs are worth a burrito is not the best strategy to get him to be more giving in bed.
I think when Jesus turned water into wine it was a sign that we should get drunk off Sangria tonight. Do it for Jesus. He died for your sins.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
He is saved in her phone as Sir. Mindfuck <3/ vag cleaner of course I need to meet him.
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
