Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
if my college career had corporate sponsors, they would be natty light and aim toothpaste.
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Brought 2 entire pizzas with to the bar, everyone loves us
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I think I just got propositioned for sex by the lady behind the counter at dunkin donuts
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
