For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
He offered me a 30 pack if I don't bring her to the party. Am I a bad friend If I take his offer?
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
No, he wouldn't have sex with me....but on the brightside I managed to fit the entire falafel sandwhich in my purse!!
Randomize
