I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
i am pretty sure she ate my hamster last night. i am thinking this because she left me a note that says she ate my hamster and my hamster is no longer in its hamster cage.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
If the egyptians can build pryamids men can walk on the moon and ron jeremy can sleep with all those bitches then we can finish these three handles of vodka
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Yeah but sometimes your vagina needs to be fed and when we are drunk we tend to eat junk food
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
Randomize
