just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
so... thinking about masturbating finally
taking the losers way out I see
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
this girl im hooking up with thought my ring was a purity ring... apparently im taking it too slow
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
He Facebook stalked his way right into my pants.
My ideal friend would be my dog as a drug dealer
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
Eating breakfast at 1:30 in the afternoon stark naked is how everyone should live
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
