She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
Hiding in the clothes rack at walmart like a 4 year old. Already scared 3 people. New fav weekend activity
And for 6 straight hours, I laid on my bedroom floor trying to convince myself it would perfectly acceptable to pee on my own floor
he asked me if i would dance for him to make it easier for him to jack off. does that answer your question.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
I would just like you to know that the guy I blew off last weekend to come find ur drunk ass just got drafted into the major leagues.
Moment of silence for the loss of that option.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I'm silent, like a masturbating ninja.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Randomize
