You know its bad when convincing your mother you were masturbating is the better alternative
the only consolation to the fact that i puked in public today was that i did it down a storm drain... so at least i am a responsible public puker
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
Am I a bad person for getting my ex to DD me and a random hookup home last night?
BTW he text me to text him later after the concert to hang out. Im prepping my bed but I should know I shouldn't count my dicks before they hatch
The important thing is that she is gone, presumably back to the depths of hell from whence she came.
I'm still not 100% sure who I'm sleeping with
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Look, I've got a really big car. We just need to put ourselves in it and put some body parts in other body parts.
you said "it's karaoke night" and tried to use my dick as a microphone
After round two, I told him he deserves an award. He bowed and did a princess wave WHILE his dick was still inside me.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
Randomize
