I am going to be the most sexually active ladybug that he has ever seen
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
Umm I need a rain check. Long story short is I have scabies. Research it if you want. I'll tell you everything another time soon, I promise.
New handbag passed the ultimate test. The walk of shame. I had a bra, tights, skirt, shirt & sweater in it and you couldn't tell. yessss.
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
Being in the club with your moms drunk friends > having a healthy relationship with your mom
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
He bought me pizza and bourbon and played scrabble with me. So naturally I slept with him.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
I broke my dick don't ask me how I need help putting in a catheter so I can piss.
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