I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
I drank all the drinks. And jump off roof. Yay
You might have crossed the line by jerking off while she was in the bathroom taking a prego test. Just saying
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Pro: She likes to masturbate to 50 shades of grey. Con: She reads 50 Shades of grey non-ironically.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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