Are you trying to threaten my boobs?
Does it really count as two different guys if they're brothers? I like to think of it as one and a half.
Based on her brazillian stubble I would guess her plan had been to wait one more date before sleeping with me. Seems the plan was flexible.
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I knew it was on when he was dancing on stage and I gave him a dollar so in return he ripped my tit out of my shirt and started sucking on it IN THE MIDDLE OF THE BAR.
I just woke up under my desk. Not to worry though, no one is in the office yet
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
When I wake up, please remind me why my shoe is in the toilet, my shower is filled with jello, and there is a naked girl sleeping on my coffee table holding a bag of Cheetos. that is all.
Yeah that's a good idea.. I like to be responsible when I trip my nuts off
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
Randomize
