Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
Look at the bright side...I have an 11 inch penis
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
She called me in the morning crying, but I was busy cleaning up bird guts, very hungover. It was a very surreal morning.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
Oprah Winfrey is a jealous, vengeful god
You're going to hell! And you're going to hell! And you! And you. You're all going to hell!!!
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
Yes, ur purse got stole with our condo keys in it but my slut ass saved us and we had a place to stay, AND I got to choke a motherfucker while riding him. Thats taking one for the team.
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