dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
my vagina's been through so much this weekend
you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
My name in their phones is "That Girl". If i can't get it to go away, I might as well live up to it.
There is a hatefuck that has the destruction level of an atom bomb raging through my viens just aching to vaporize her.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Look on the bright side, one day you will get to tell your grandkids how grandpappy got roofied on his 21st and woke up in a for sale house missing his shoes
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Dude just bought the table 3 bottles of champaign and broke one on the floor as his "signature" and he makes me want this recession hit harder
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
I attempted to walk home at 5:30 this morning cuz i was mad at him cuz he didn't want to cuddle and didn't have pizza. I got 3 houses down n fell over.
There's a pregnant girl taking shots of apple juice
Randomize
