Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
Just hooked up on shake weight girl's dad's porsche. What are YOU doing with your life?
Do you know how hard it is to write about pediatric crohn's when we're trying to figure out the keg situation for graduation?
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Also, just woke up in a Romney tank and sequin flag panties. Merica.
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
Randomize
