Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I'm drunk eating a quesadilla while this kid is tryina come over and I'm just like no. I want the quesadilla.
There I was, puking into the toilet, and he was rubbing my feet, buck naked. I feel like a drunk Disney princess.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Guess how much it costs to flush your pants down the toilet?
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