Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
dude you were so wasted last night you ate a sandwich made out of tomatos, cheese, doritos, salt & pepper. Then you heated it in the micro for 5 min to melt the cheese.
i woke up in the fire place with a lighter in my hand. if i would have died the night would have made up for it.
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
One good thing about being really drunk when you go out to dinner is that the leftovers are a surprise. These quesadillas had shrimp in them! Who knew?
This morning on my way to work I saw a guy ride his bike straight into a woman and her dog while trying to light a bowl. Thought of you.
So i know i said I'm turning over a new leaf, but i met a guy with a dick piercing. I have to sleep with him. For science.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Randomize