We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
call of duty 2 was the straight man's twilight
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
dont be like that, i wasnt picking him over you. I was picking multiple orgasms over zoolander.
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
You call it a hangover, I call it a baby squirrel burrowing its way out of my head.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
I don't even know man. I was to busy having beer showered on me and grabbing some balls
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
The girls said some drunk guy in footie pajamas was asking for me when they opened the doors. I thought we agreed you were gonna stay home and microwave me some bacon.
Randomize
