A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
You're like my zumba instructor for alcoholism right now
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I'm so excited for post-beer fest chipotle. It will be better than scared shitless pre-go karting chipotle.
Things he has managed to cum on so far on spring break: my bikini, my back-up bikini, three of my four bras, two pairs of panties, four beds, six chairs, the floor of several hotel rooms, the window/door to the balcony from both sides, my tits, my face, my stomach, his stomach, my ass, his best friend's girlfriend's face, and his best friend's dick.
Just FYI spring break is over and you're supposed to be back in class but hey sounds like you had your orgy so congrats.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
So I wake up to my ex girlfriends underwear hanging from the ceiling fan and the only thing i can think of is "what time is the game"
Randomize
