Don't be scared. It'll feel very good. And you'll be clean afterwards. I'm growling right now.
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
On a scale of "impaired judgement" to "Mel Gibson," how drunk are you?
Toaster
i bought another $5 worth of vodka. with change. i look like a homeless alcoholic. i need your dino cups or else i'll be forced to make a giant jello bowl shot
Just threw the poptarts. Sgits boutta go Down. 1 liter of wine
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
You know it was a good night when you're lying on the couch in your pjs at 4pm having a pitcher of ice water for breakfast.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Randomize
