cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
I was so high I thought there were pigeons in my room. Long story short there are now donut crumbs all around my bedroom.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
I don't know where Tiffany is but I just saw her shoes in the bar lost and found
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
i was in burrito mode and too drunk to move. no fucks were given. none.
well if they don't get here soon...no fuck it, I'm going to the strip club.
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
