I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
u were so high that u chewed on candle wax for an hour
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
I think you're going to have to drive me to white haven. I don't know if my brain can handle having my mom drop me off at a strip club.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
At second job interview this week. Wearing pants to hide pole dancing bruises. This my life.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
We're meant to be. Apparently God wants me to get dicked down pretty good too so I'm not complaining about destiny
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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