If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
Did you know that if you hit someone in the head with a frozen loaf of bread you can knock them unconscious?
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
Just stole my moms weed, left a note saying sorry.. Hope she isn't mad.
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