whats the name of the jew you used to have sex with that lives on evergreen?
be more specific...?
I found the other part of your tooth if you want to put it under your pillow
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
he asked you how you felt and you yelled "I FEEL SO PROACTIVE!" and started coloring with sharpies
He just climbed off me and used my hairspray to fix his hair. If he hadn't just gone down on me I would think he's gay.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
Bro, I just googled 36 year old pussy so when I do see it I won't be shocked.
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Randomize
