I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
They better compete for your attention. Dual to the fuck
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
by the way whatever wisdom you imparted upon me last night was lost to whatever i smoked out of a beer can.
Last thing I remember is ranting about hating pants. Woke up this morning pants less. Couldn't find them, decided to leave. Driving without pants is surprisingly liberating.
I'm making a date with someone on Playstation Home. That's how my sex life is going right now.
Btw had an awesome time last night. Found some blood on my shirt and ear but I'll chalk it up to the tequila shots.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
Randomize
