come outside for a special surprise it involves huge boobs
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
Is it just me or did a policeman park your car last night?
Bullshit. No way. If I brushed past your penis it was completely coincidental.
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
It'd be a romantic, consensual abduction
Oh if we have sex in public no one will frown upon it. They will stand and cheer for it
Remember that time you gave me a fat lip with your vag? We should do that again!
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I think the hamburger goblin stole my cigarettes. I left my purse behind her table and they're not in it now.
It seems that I didn’t convey clearly enough how well and truly fucked we are, Jack. Listen to me very closely: we are DEAD.
Randomize
