Yeah he is here but I can't let him know I am until he has like 30 min worth of drinks. so when he see me he isn't like "omg ew,NO!"
I have so much to learn from you, wise slut
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
come over i need a lifeguard for my shower
I know you think I'm being paranoid, but can you please make sure Danny doesn't rub my wedding invitation on his balls?
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
Hooked up with a guy resembling a bearded Cher. I need the lenses on my beer goggles fixed. Pronto.
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
Dude you came into the room last night soak and wet and told me you just took a shit in the shower
Randomize
