They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
He snuck into some random hotel's continental breakfast at 3 AM and then passed out on a bench in the lobby. When the cops found him they made him empty out his pockets. No phone, no ID just muffins.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
so the last visual we have of him for the next 87 weeks is him outside on the ground rolling around yelling I HATE BLOWJOBS
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
I just paid my school fees like a real adult who doesn't get accidentally drunk on a Tuesday night
Randomize
