things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
You burnt your salmon and tried to mail it. Post marked to: Starving Kid in Africa
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I just smoked weed out of a baked potato.
You rock my world.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
new district manager is here. you need to come in early
5th mimosa says otherwise
Dude, he wouldn't have sex with me during halftime cause we were rooting for different teams and that would be "bad juju", I had to settle for 69.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
Ever had one of those went so hard last night you woke up at the foot of the bed naked wondering where your phone ended up?
My life is pants optional.
Randomize
