So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
i just wasnt prepared to have the baby of one of two french firemen. threesomes are too confusing.
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
4pm update. Theres smashed cake inside my duffel bag, a vodka bottle in the dish drainer, and the most productive thing ive done is make 40 pigs in a blanket
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
My pants are like a grocery bag containing ONLY jelly beans right now.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Randomize
