well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
I saw your arrest video on youtube. you look so thin!
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
Just so you know in the morning, yes you did send your bartender a snap of your boobs. No I didn't try to stop you because you used sound logic for doing so.
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
hahahaha classic. this is why you are going to a college with a hospital right next to it
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
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