Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
i literally forgot his name and just started calling him "waffles"
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
Just had to return the shit I stole from the dining hall, with everyone watching...apparently there ARE consequences for being drunk, coked up and belligerent.
you were standing in two feet of water, screaming at people walking by to "call river rescue".
The couch is in the bathroom. I don't understand how that is even possible. I couldnt even fit that shelf thingy through the door. Come help. I am about to pee my pants.
He bought me a oreo ice cream cake with "thanks for not calling the cops!" written in icing. If that doesn't sum up winter break, I don't know what does.
It's amazing how not interested in talking to him I am since I've decided that he probably has chlamydia.
wanna mail me your GoPro for St.Patties and I'll mail it back to you coverend in puke?
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
Was considering going to moonshine but I think I'm just gonna stay home and drink beer because there is no law against partial nudity here.
I woke up with my face covered in mustard. Your mom said I ate hotdogs like a pornstar
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
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