does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
I am so hungover and cant move but craving a Wendys frosty so bad. I might have to watch 2 girls 1 cup just to settle the urge
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
Dude, fuck the siberian warm up. You can't put vodka in hot chocolate. Learn from my mistakes
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Have you ever just like not slept in so long that everything looks like a lava lamp?
It only takes one line of cocaine, and you try to shotput a fucking kitchen table
Let's be real. I'm the Usain Bolt of running away after hookups. Fastest (wo)man alive.
anyways, do you want to make more embarrassing memories that im bound to remind you about later and laugh about?
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
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